Got to raise some hell last night with my main squeeze.
I love you Samantha Marie Arrambide.
Random lack of self hatred.
I have no idea what I’m doing.
I will never have a father. I thought you were a good man. I thought you could heal all the wounds my real dad, and all the other fake dads had torn in my heart.
But your the biggest piece of SHIT out of all of them. You made us believe you were different, but you made sure to prove us wrong didn’t you?
I was a waste of time? No wonder I don’t have any friends? FUCK YOU.
I lost respect for you awhile ago, ya know when you fucked my mom over. But now I have lost the understanding of how the fuck you’re allowed to be alive.
The only thing I feel for you now is rage and disgust.
I’ve found the only dreams you cannot haunt, are those lovely chemical dreams.
Until I realized your feelings are for a girl you assumed me to be.
Now it feels like shit to know you actually hate everything I am.
I’d forgive you for what you called me, even though it broke my heart.
Truth is, I already have.
Truth is, even though I’m trying to act like I’m mad at you and I never want to see you again, I cry everyday because you were, and still are such a huge part of who I am.
You’re literally the only person I ever let in as much as I let you in. And you did one of the biggest things I begged you not to do. You threw it my face.
And I hate the fact that I struggle several times a day not to send you a text begging you to want to be in my life again. Every time I get a stupid idea or a funny though, I type it out, and then remember we aren’t friends now.
You made my life brighter, and you always made me laugh. And I need that really bad.
I want you back in my life, and I want my best friend back, but I know that’s not possible.
…I think what hurts more than anything is I didn’t fight to keep your love. And I’m sorry.
I love you, forever. You changed my life more than you’ll ever know.
I hope life treats you well and loves you like it should. You really do deserve it, and I’ll miss you more than I’ve missed anything.
Goodbye, and shut the door.
What the fuck is the point?
-when you send sexy texts of what you want to do to me until I get there
-when you say ‘that was the longest wait ever’ and then kiss me hard
-when you push me up against the wall, grabbing my ass
-when you nibble my ear while you undress me
-when you throw me down on the bed and tease me
-when you start fucking me hard
-when you pull my hair and moan lightly in my ear
-when you make me cum 3 times in 2 hours
-when you snuggle up to me after and kiss me sweetly
This afternoon was much needed and so goddamn amazing. Thank you, the love of my life.
When I make my ramen too spicy 🔫
1. Nobody is there for me and nobody gives one single fuck besides my mother.
2. No matter how many times I have dropped everything and went out of my way just to benefit people, I can’t ask for one small fucking thing. Because everyone comes before me.
So everyone fuck off. You have all hurt my feeling so much more than you will ever know.
